sometimes, we all need someone to talk to
Sex is the physical contact between individuals that involves the genitalia of at least one person.  
This includes:
  • penetration
  • oral sex
  • anal sex
  • mutual masturbation
  • petting
  • feeling up


Love is a deep and tender feeling of affection for or an attachment or devotion to someone.
Furthermore:
  • love is patient
  • love is kind
  • it always protects
  • it always trusts
  • it always hopes
  • it always perseveres


  • it does not envy
  • it does not boast
  • it is not proud
  • it is not rude
  • it is not self-seeking
  • it is not easily angered
  • it doesn't keep score

Sex
Every form of media today bombards us with sexual images and messages. Sex sells stuff. Movies, television and music make it seem like everyone's having sex and you're not normal if you aren't doing it too. Well, just what is sex, what is it meant for and what's so wrong with having sex whenever you feel like it? We'll look into all those questions briefly.

What is sex and what is it meant for?
According to most movies, TV shows and music these days, sex and love are the same thing. But sex and love are not the same. Sex was created by God to allow people to reproduce (have kids). It was not created for recreation. It is meant to be the ultimate act of love between two people who are committed to each other for a lifetime through marriage. Sex is physical. Love is emotional and spiritual. Sex is temporary. Love is forever.
Let's look at both a little closer:
Sex is not love. Don't let someone force you into having sex before you're ready. Some people will use the word "love" to pressure others into having sex. That's a selfish, manipulative act. You don't have to have sex just to please someone else or to prove that you are worth loving. Respect yourself and have a mind of your own. Experience true sexual freedom!

What's wrong with having sex before marriage?
The risks associated with casual sex are at best, life-changing and at worst, life-destroying. Casual sex (protected or unprotected) can lead to unwanted pregnancy, depression, and sexually transmitted diseases. Yes, even "protected" sex can lead to pregnancy and STD's because condoms fail 18 - 44% of the time, due to breakage, holes and slippage.  In addition:
  • Condoms offer NO protection against HPV, the #1 cause of cervical cancer.
  • A sperm is 450 times larger than the HIV virus, if a sperm can get through holes in a condom, so can the virus that causes AIDS. In one study done, 33% of the latex condoms leaked HIV sized particles.
  • Surveys of sexually active teens have shown that condoms are used less than 50% of the time.
  • It is estimated that over 65 million people are now infected with some STD and each year, 19 million new infections occur.
  • Sex with a sexually active individual exposes you to all their previous partners and all their partners' previous partners... and so on. Click here to see the Sexual Exposure Chart. It will shock you!
  • Oral sex is really sex. Avoiding penetration doesn't mean you are avoiding disease. HPV (human papillomavirus) causes 99.7 percent of cervical cancer cases and the deaths of 5,000 women each year. If the virus is ingested orally through oral sex, it can be responsible for both head and neck cancer and oral warts.

Beyond the physical dangers and problems, casual sex causes huge problems emotionally. Human beings were created with the innate desire for intimacy. Casual sex is based on a false sense of intimacy which stirs up feelings of doubt, fear of rejection, loss of trust, fear of disease or pregnancy, low self-esteem, bitterness, anger and emotional shutdown. Just look at some of these statistics:
  • Over 25% of teenage girls who are sexually acive report that they are depressed all, most, or a lot of the time.
  • Sixty-seven percent (67%) of sexually experienced teens wish that they had waited longer to become sexually active.
  • Sixty-one percent (61%)of girls and 23 percent of boys say they were pressured by their dating partner to have sex.
  • Forty-five percent (45%) of girls have sex because they want to be loved, while 28 percent of boys give that reason.
  • Thirty-eight percent (38%) of girls and 43 percent of boys had sex because they were afraid of being teased about their virginity.
Sources:
(1)  Merriam-Webster's On-line Dictionary.  (c) 2007-2008, Merriam-Webster, Inc. Apr. 29,2008 [www.merriam-webster.com]

(2)  Webster's New World Dictionary, 2nd College Ed. New York: Prentice Hall Press, 1986.

(3)  Condoms: Do they really work? Snowflake, Arizona: Heritage House '76, Inc., 1998.

(4)  Human Papillomavirus. Snowflake, Arizona: Heritage House '76, Inc., 2000

(5)  What You Should Know About Condoms.  Snowflake, Arizona: Heritage House '76, Inc., 2006.

(6)  How At Risk Are You? Chattanooga, Tennessee: Why kNOw Abstinence Education Programs, 2005.

(7)  DiMarco, Hayley. Technical Virgin, How Far Is Too Far? Grand Rapids, Michigan: Revell, 2006.

(8)  Luce, Ron.  "It's Only A Tattoo" and Other Myths Teens Believe, A Parent's Response Handbook. Colorado Springs, Colorado: Cook Communications Ministries, 2006.
The following links are to fact sheets provided by the Center for Disease Control. To view info on common STD's, you will need the Adobe PDF Reader.
Causes easily spread warts, genital cancers in both sexes, painful intercourse. Warts difficult to get rid of . Main cause of cerivcal cancer.
Recurrent, painful, genital blisters, but disease can be transmitted even if sores not present. Life-threatening for babies born to mothers with fresh outbreak.
HIV is contagious from the time acquired even if not yet found by testing. Mother may transmit to baby in utero or in milk. HIV almost always results in AIDS, AIDS in death.
Very contagious sore (chancre) that disappears untreated, yet disease is only dormant. Reappears as months and years go by with serious results: blindness, insanity, bone and heart damage, death. Mother can transmit to fetus.
Pus-producing infection that can also affect other parts of the body:rectum, eyes, heart, throat, joints, brain.
Usually mild or no symptoms. Can cause sterility in women and permanent damage to male urinary tract.
Female disease caused by another infection (usually Chlamydia or Gonorrhea) that travels up the reproductive tract to the pelvic, even abdominal cavity. Can result in chronic pain, sterility, tubal pregnancy, adhesions, death.
Adheres to pubic hair and passed on during sexual intercourse. Red, pimply areas that can become infected.
Mite that burrows into skin causing red, itching areas that can become infected. Also passed by infested bedding and clothes.
Viral  STD's- Incurable
Bacterial STD's -
Curable with right conditions
Insects/Parasites - Curable
Associated with an imbalance in the bacteria that are normally found in a woman’s vagina. Not much is known about how women get BV.
Caused by three strains of the bacterium Chlamydia trachomatis.
The most common curable STD in young, sexually active women. Men infected with parasite have very few signs or symptoms. Some women have signs or symptoms of infection which include a frothy, yellow-green vaginal discharge with a strong odor. The infection also may cause discomfort during intercourse and urination, as well as irritation and itchingof the female genital area. In rare cases, lower abdominal pain can occur.
Doesn't sound like casual sex is very rewarding, does it? It's very destructive - emotionally, spiritually, mentally and physically. Saving sex for marriage is the wisest, most gratifying decision you can make - for you and for your future spouse and children.